Towel #2: hung from a curtain road in the living room, intended to fool people into thinking it is "an expensive art tapestry." More likely, your friends will be bemusedly picturing you running naked through the house after a shower and throwing yourself spread-eagle at the wall. And it is important to note that the word "bemusedly" is not a synonym for "erotically."

Also, isn't that one of the options for the back of the deck of cards in Windows 3.1 Solitaire games?